Posts Tagged ‘Announcement’

Pickle’s latest decree: “ALL YOUR CRUISES ARE PLAYED OUT”

In his latest “State of the Scene” address, the Almighty Pickle has come out with an unprecedented observation. According to his most recent statement, lining up in a parking lot to cruise anywhere (and in particular, car shows) makes you nothing more than a “Vehicular Lemming”.

“The trouble is,” said Pickle, “these silly little people do nothing but gather in public places, then stick signs on their cars and drive around like so many show ponies. Its sad, really… wanting to be included in anything so badly that you’ll just follow the wanker in front of you with a silly little sticker on your car.”

He also noted that following people around isn’t actually a “rally” and shouldn’t described as such.

“All they’re doing is following each other around and taking rolling pictures of each other’s cars like some type of photographic gangbang,” he continued, “and this year? I’m hoping they all get flat tires.”

Stock image, used without permission. Copyright 2009 by some shitbird I don't care about.

This most recent statement comes fresh on the heels of his “Painters tape all over your car makes you look like a fucking giggledick, knock it off already!” dissertation.

He added, “In the future, I’d hope that these sissies would think before they do something so unoriginal… but in my experience, they never do.”